Last night I spent five-and-something hours applying for national identity cards for my children. The process itself is definitely quite easy, and usually much faster, too. It seems my limits of patience have now reached their furthermost optimum. I might have been a monk in my previous life, kneeling cross-legged in a prayer, slowly growing moss between my ears.
How hard can it be, I asked myself, rhetorically, and was proved, once again as per usual – wrong. Very very wrong.
It was a rare, silent and eerily quiet evening when I realised I needed to finally get this documentation situation sorted. Kids need the cards. Real soon.
Thank goodness of the rainbow-coloured power of Universe, I live in an e-country, where people are so introverted that they avoid having conversation with strangers at any cost, so you can get your sorry buttock online and fill out some applications and feel psychologically undisturbed. Heh.
Alright, let’s do this. So, this browser won’t let me save the bloody pre-filled application. No biggie. Let’s try another one, shall we? Ah, crap. Same story. How about that one? Uhm.
Fine. Don’t work.
I’m a technological prodigy, mastermind, I breathe computers and bureaucracy. I’m above this. Filling applications is “ma thang”. I will download this damned thing and fill it then.
Take that you stupid application!
Wait, no. What is this thing? Why do I have to pay Adobe for signing a document? Why do I even have to sign it with Adobe?
I remember the dial-up time of the internet and I swear, it took me the same amount of time for me to fill out one form that it took once upon a golden time to load a fuzzy picture of your mum’s finger instead of the portrait of your siblings she was taking.
Nothing I tried was working. But wait, I have done it once before, haven’t I? I wondered what I did differently that time. Lucky for me, I had the previous application, from two years ago, on my laptop, still. Bless that lazy arse of mine. And it still worked! And I could fill it out and save it too. Well, fuck me, right? Amn’t I the greatest? Even at three a.m. in the morning.
Easy as pie.